Not my proudest moment

Last week, M and I completed W5D3 with a reasonable degree of success. We ran (shuffled) for nearly the entire 20 minutes. Twice I had to take a few strides as walking but it only about 30 seconds each time. I struggle with counting the session as a complete success because of the brief walking breaks. My personality tends to see things as they are written and in black in white so I feel bad taking full credit if I can't accomplish it as it was written.

I went to yoga Saturday and swam on Sunday and was rarin' to go for Wk6D1 on Monday.

It was freezing (like 5 degrees) outside so much of my motivation had waned in the weather conditions. The first intervals went okay. By the time I hit the middle, 8 minute interval, my calves were locked town tight. I could hardly take a step. This happened once before, which is what caused me to see the exercise physiologist. Stretching didn't help at all.

I felt so betrayed by my body (I've been doing my part, why wasn't it holding up its end of the bargain) that I lost it. I was crying and cursing. My husband did everything right, trying to comfort me, but I wasn't having any of it! I threatened to quit, etc. I was kind of angry with him too (through no fault of his own). I mean, he runs with me because its important to me, not because it was his idea or anything. And I can tell he is physically holding himself back, which upsets me because 1. I exercise twice as much as he does (crosstraining) and 2. its such a struggle for me and if I had his body I wouldn't want to be held back (he always stays with me no matter how much I encourage him to go faster on his own). I know he understood that my anger wasn't about him as much as it was frusteration at my own shortcomings but it still was a lousy way to act towards someone who I love deeply and who has done nothing but love and support me.

I'm not going to quit. It may take me longer than the prescribed C25k 9 weeks to be able to run a 10 minute mile but I won't give up. I owe it to myself and my family to get healthy so I'll keep putting one foot in front of the other for as long as I can.